I used to believe that we could only have one mother.
 
I was wrong.
 
That's because my definition of the word "mother" was based on it being a noun.  Four years ago when we adopted our daughter Leila from Russia, I realized that the word "mother" was actually a verb.
 
Once I realized this, I saw that in my life I had many mothers, not just my one biological mother. Several people, actively "mothered" me into who I am today.
 
Being a mother, like a leader, is more than just a role.  In fact too many leaders, like mothers, rely too heavily on the title and do little-to-none active, verb-like "mothering" at all. 

That's because mothering, like leadership, takes a lot of effort and time.  It is always easier to slip into an 'I said so", authoritative, noun-like stance that a role usually relies upon.
 
It is no surprise that when I became a late-in-life mother, I finally understood the true meaning of leadership.  Prior to that, I wasn't the best leader that I could have been.

 

Motherhood has taught me a ton about leadership and now through my book, The Connected and Committed Leader, I teach my lessons from home as a way to achieve better results at work and in life.  I see leadership as a life practice for success that is relevant in any realm of our lives.

 

I recently connected with Jamie Woolf, a terrific woman, mother and author of a book that also makes the connection between motherhood and leadership.  Her book, Mom in Chief helps take her lessons from the workplace and applies them back home.  You can say that our two books together create a full circle for women; from home to work and back to home. 
 
Mothering, the verb, is the ultimate leadership experience (along with fathering, but we will cover that in next month's issue). 
 
After all, as mothers we have to get results on a daily basis with often unwilling or unmotivated participants!  And, at the end of the day, we want our children to reach their highest potential with an empowered belief in themselves.  Sounds like the job of a leader, doesn't it? 
 
Yes.  No doubt.

 

Here are some tips for redefining both leadership and motherhood into active verbs and leaving the rigid, role-like nouns of these two terms behind:

 

1.  Practice active observation.

 

2.  Engage in actively receiving others.

 

3.  Actively guide others.